Birthday girl

It was fun to celebrate Bonnie's birthday today. It was "celebrate with meals day" — I fixed stuffed strawberry french toast for breakfast-in-bed, then we went out for a sandwich at Kneader's for lunch, and enjoyed an evening dinner with Sarah and Brian at Goodwood in the evening.

We did miss Matt today; he always added excitement to our celebrations. But we're grateful to have Brian to "fill in" for him!


Bonnie is such a dear. She also celebrated her birthday by accompanying me to a stake youth activity tonight, where we helped "chaperon" as over a hundred Deacons and Beehives in our stake learned to dance. Such fun!

I love you, Bonnie!

It's official!!!

We had a visit from two very giddy young people this evening. We were hoping this day was coming soon; but it took us by surprise tonight. I was grateful it came on a night when I was at home and available! Sarah texted me a photo of "the ring" at 5:38, and we convinced them to come over in the evening to "show and tell." And "giddy" is certainly the best word to describe these two.



We've been bursting with excitement for the past two weeks, waiting for this day. On April 8, Brian's birthday, Sarah let him know that she was ready for him to propose. Bonnie and I had quite a few discussions with Sarah leading up to that, since it was pretty obvious to Sarah that Brian was already ready; Sarah asked for a Priesthood blessing and considered the question very carefully. We were pretty thrilled to hear she had decided it was time! So April 8 was perhaps their "unofficial" engagement day, and in the two weeks since then, our discussions have been "when" instead of "if." We've been bursting with excitement, waiting for the chance to talk openly and announce it to the world!

The problem was the timing — just in the middle of finals at BYU! It was hard for the two of them to find time for ring shopping, and for Brian to make his purchase and his plans. But when he called to schedule an appointment for a discussion with me, I was pretty happy. He came over on Tuesday and we had a great 45-minute discussion about his (their) plans, philosophy, goals, priorities, etc. Sarah and Bonnie were worried that I would be too hard on him; but I really enjoyed the talk! I came away more convinced than ever that this young man would take good care of my princess.

So now, the fun begins. We're tentatively working towards early August. Wahoo! Congratulations, Sarah and Brian!!

Springtime Surprise

I woke up Thursday morning to quite a surprise. We had expected perhaps a little snow overnight, but instead were blasted with an unusually wet and heavy spring storm.



Utah is a delightful place to live! The roads can be a little treacherous, and sometimes these storms come at inconvenient times. But there is nothing like the beauty of the trees, mountains, and sky after one of these wonderful storms. And of course, we're very grateful for the late-season "moisture" to help our water conditions in the coming summer.

Daddy's Little Princess

Can it be possible? Has it really been 21 years already??

I have vague memories of April 15, 1988. Bonnie and I were living in Manassas, Virginia. We had been married for nine months, and she was due to deliver. I was in the hospital receiving chemotherapy, not able to provide much support. We had hoped Sarah would wait until I finished the current course of treatment, but she was in a hurry! When Bonnie started into labor on April 13, her wonderful parents took over providing the transportation, encouragement, communication, etc. The nurses and staff in the hospital would relay messages to my hospital room about what was happening with Bonnie down in maternity.

Fortunately, I was able to wheel my IV pole down to the delivery room and be there with Bonnie through the later stages of labor, and when Sarah was born. It was a remarkable thing to experience, even through my drugged haze. We were so happy! I remember having to write down some of the details so I could answer questions when people called to talk.


Things quickly improved. I soon returned to health, and life moved on. Sarah was a sweet and darling baby, much loved in our family and extended family. We moved from Virginia to Colorado when she was just a year old, then from Colorado to Utah two years after that.

Sarah has always been a darling little girl; she could melt her Daddy's heart with a smile, and the twinkle in her beautiful blue eyes was something to behold.


As she grew and matured into a teenager, we were stunned at how easy it was to be parents. We must have been REALLY good at it, since she turned out so well with such little effort on our part! (Of course, we eventually realized it was in spite of us, not because of us, that Sarah was so good!)


Sarah excelled in high school, developing her intellectual, social, and musical gifts along the way. She graduated high in her class and received a full scholarship to BYU. She's now part-way through the BYU Nursing program, and continuing to do everything she does exceedingly well. She continues to impress her parents and bring them great joy!

Sarah loved her brother from the day he joined our family. It's been fun to watch their relationship grow through the years. They have a wonderful and special bond.


Oh, and another thing has brought even more twinkle to her beautiful eyes in the past few months, for which her parents are also very happy and grateful:


How is this for sweet contentment:


Sarah, we love you, more and more as the years go by! We are SO proud of you and wish you all the best in the continuing adventure of life!!

Springtime in the Rockies

Today was officially the first day of spring! In Utah, the date doesn't guarantee anything; we could as easily have a snowstorm as sunshine. But it's been a pleasant, warm week, and today seemed quite delightful. It's fun to see the crocuses popping up, the forsythias in bloom, the swelling buds on the fruit trees, and most especially, the daffodils. I have always loved daffodils!

A happy note

We are very much looking forward to Friday — P-day for our Elder! We're hoping for an email, though we hear reports that the email accounts aren't getting set up very quickly. In the mean time, we've had to make do with a few scribbled notes from him, requesting items he needs (his other scriptures, clothing items, cookies, etc.). We continue to worry about how Matt is adjusting and how he's feeling. We have visions of depression, discouragement at the study demands, loneliness in missing his friends, struggles with early morning hours, etc.

Today in the mail we got one of those short notes requesting a few things. At the bottom was a tiny "PS" that meant the world to us. Amazing how a few words can convey so much!


We're still eager for the full letter, but for now, our hearts are much more at peace.

A son in the MTC

It's "the day after." I drove by the MTC on my way to a meeting, and the emotions were strong. My son is in there! He's somewhere in one of the buildings, in a class or a meeting or an activity of some kind. I wish I could see him, or talk with him. I hope he's doing well.

I loved my time in the MTC, and being there for a few minutes with Matt brought back lots of sweet memories and emotions. I hope and pray it will be a wonderful, positive time for him as well.

It was so very bittersweet to drop Matt off at the MTC yesterday, as I'm sure is usually the case for most parents. We have looked forward to this day since he was a child ("I hope they call me on a mission..."). At times, we have wished the day would come sooner; at others, we've wanted to postpone the day and prepare more. But when it's really here, there are way too many emotions crowding together:

• Of course, one of the greatest emotions is the joy of having a son who is worthy and desirous to be there. There is not a place we'd rather have him be today, not an activity we'd rather have him engaged in. We know he was called by God and will be greatly blessed by this mission, and will be able to bless and serve as "an instrument in the hands of God" as he does his best. That brings us great joy.
  
  
• There is sadness in the realization that a phase of our lives has now ended. Sarah is already very independent and not likely to return home; and now, even if Matt comes home for a season after his mission, he will be much more grown up and independent (we assume!). We are basically done raising our children, and will never return to that time in the same way.
  
  
• I think I am a little surprised at the emptiness I feel in many ways — or is it loneliness? For 19 years, and maybe especially for the last year, we have been so involved in Matt's life. We've been conscious and aware of almost every step and activity; we've tried to help and guide and direct. But now, nothing. Not only do we have no involvement and influence, we don't even have awareness of what he's doing or thinking or feeling! It's such a strange difference, to go from one extreme to the other so abruptly. All we can do is hope and pray and wait.
  
  
• There is concern in my heart about the challenges and stress ahead for Matt. These next two months will be difficult for him in many ways; making the adjustment from his "former life" to the new regimen (both in schedule and focus), going through the challenges of learning Spanish, missing his friends (and maybe his family), and so on. We'll be praying as never before for the help he will so desperately need!
  

I have learned much from Matt, and with Matt, during the past 19 years. During this final year I've had to accept that he would not prepare for his mission the way I wish he would; his personality and approach to life are just too different from mine. That was hard for me; I wanted so much to help him but found I wasn't able to, not very much. I couldn't make him into a copy of myself. I had to work with him the way he was.

We've had some wonderful experiences together. We've gone hiking and camping. We rode bikes on remote trails. We've played golf and racquetball. I've bought him music he liked and helped him on the computer. He's helped me in the yard, mowed the lawn, cleaned the cars. When he wanted to get into body building, we joined the gym together and worked with a trainer. There are many sweet memories.

I've tried to tell missionary stories and have gospel conversations whenever we could. We've prayed together. I gave him Priesthood blessings and ordained him an Elder. We home taught together and taught lessons in a fireside and in his elders quorum. We've gone to the temple. Finally, I was privileged to set him apart as a missionary.

I miss my son, my only son. God bless you, my friend.